David Foster Wallace
Originally uploaded by Steve Rhodes.
David Foster Wallace killed himself on September 12, 2008.
He died more than a month ago and I still feel raw and unable to truly verbalize the deep loss I feel. I was and continue to be shocked at my own sense of loss and how large it must be for those who actually felt his personal presence-who knew him, loved him, held him. I never got to hear him speak, I felt I had time, that it would happen at some point.
I have started reading Infinite Jest for a fourth time. I will make this year the year of DFW. I will read/reread all of his fiction, non fiction and speeches. I will pay attention and take what I can and commit it to memory.
I am so deeply saddened at the thought of his pain, at imagining what he must have felt at the end and I am so angry that we suffer so. That still, depression is a disease that is managed by guesses and trials. I hope that he has found peace. That is all he was looking for.
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